Three Kings United have had a real mixed bag of a season in 2019, but on 28 July they issued a reminder to all and sundry that they are still one of the best teams in the country by comprehensively dismantling Lotto Northern Premier Women's League leaders Eastern Suburbs 4-0 at Keith Hay Park. "The Lilywhites" had only conceded six goals in their preceding fifteen league games going into this match, but United took just 23 seconds to serve notice that Corina Brown would do well to keep another clean sheet in this contest. Newly crowned Women's Futsal Player of the Year Shivi Anthony worked an opening with Isabella Richards and Tessa Leong on the right before seeing her cross headed out by Rebekah Van Dort. Leong latched onto the ball and belted a rising twenty yard drive a yard over Brown's crossbar. Three minutes later, Suburbs could have had the lead, United 'keeper Alisha Perry almost getting caught in possession in her area by Annie Byrne after dwelling far too long on the ball upon receipt of a Rebecca Burrows back-pass. It was an early wake-up call for the home team, who responded to it superbly. After Brown had smothered a deflected shot from Burrows, United opened the scoring in the ninth minute. Anthony and Leong worked a one-two on the right before the fullback played the ball inside to captain Jessie Mathews. She brought Maisy Dewell into play, and the sphere was swiftly steered into the stride of overlapping fullback Emma Leaming. She stormed past Erinna Wong to the by-line before delivering a delicious low cross to the near post, where Richards arrived right on cue to dart in front of Van Dort and stab the ball past Brown - 1-0, and a perfect parting gift for the scorer, who returns to her studies at Hofstra University later this week. Suburbs sought a swift riposte via Kate Seatter, but her twenty-five yarder sizzled narrowly over the bar, to which United responded with another enterprising move in the twentieth minute. Caitlin Pritchard, Burrows, Mathews, Alosi Bloomfield and Richards all contributed to create an opening for Leong, whose shot was smothered by Brown. A succession of Three Kings free-kicks followed, all for ill-timed Suburbs challenges. Burrows took them all, the last of which, from thirty-five yards, dipped and crashed against the top of the crossbar in the 26th minute. Employing the passing game to which they are well suited, but which they've seldom used this season, United continued to hold sway, and on the half-hour carved Suburbs open once more with another enchanting interchange, with Anthony, Bloomfield, Leong and Richards all featuring before the overlapping Anthony whipped in a cross which Seatter was forced to turn past her own post. The resulting corner was cleared downfield by Kate Carlton to Jade Parris, who was largely deprived of service in this match, an indication of the dominance United exerted in midfield. But Carlton's clearance bypassed that area of the park on this occasion, and the striker instantly turned Pritchard, only for the defender to strike back with a timely tackle in the area, forcing a corner when she could easily have conceded a penalty. Referee Ashley Wilson was the centre of Suburbs' attention seconds later, after Leah Mettam's corner had been punched out at the near post by Perry. The ball struck a United player's arm, prompting penalty claims aplenty from those in the immediate vicinity as well as Suburbs' fans on the sideline. The official was unmoved, however, much to the visitors' frustration, which they channeled into trying to find an equaliser before half-time. O'Brien only just failed to get on the end of a teasing Mettam corner in the 38th minute, while Parris' neat chest control and Hannah Hoeksema's pass invited O'Brien to shoot on the turn six minutes later, only for the ball to hit the hoardings rather than bulge the net. As in the first half, so in the second - United hit the ground running from the first whistle, with their reward this time virtually instantaneous. A corner was earned on the left, with Richards delivering the ball into the near post area. Carlton headed it away, but only as far as Leaming, who returned the ball to Richards. She cut inside before clipping a cross into the goalmouth. Ten

yards out from goal, the unmarked figure of Leong leapt skywards to head the ball towards the target, her downward header beating the flailing fingertips of the diving figure of Brown before going in off the post - 2-0. Cat. Pigeons. "What's happening in Hamilton?", nervous Suburbs fans asked. Sadly, not all clubs are as committed to media coverage as "The Lilywhites", something which, for mine, should be policed and enforced by the powers-that-be far more vigorously than, say, any coaching qualification shortcomings a club may have. Imagine having a nationwide network of club-based Twitter correspondents, each covering the exploits of their club's senior men's and women's first teams each weekend during the season in the leading regional leagues around the country ... All that's needed for it to happen is some instigation, incentive and implementation work at national and federation level, a wee bit of training re what's required to a couple of volunteers at each club, who could be funded via sponsorship of the network, and we'd have a live nationwide scoring feed available on our phones every Saturday and Sunday during the season. Bliss! I digress. The situation became untenable for the visitors in the 53rd minute, as Dewell was tripped in the area. Referee Wilson had no hesitation in pointing to the spot, prompting debate among the United players as to who should take the kick. Dewell it was who eventually stepped up to the mark, but if her initial reluctance was borne from a lack of confidence in addressing the ball from twelve yards, there was no evidence of it in her execution, an unerring strike which arrowed high beyond Brown's dive into the top corner of the net - 3-0. Straight away, Suburbs set about reducing the deficit. Carter and Parris combined to play in the freshly introduced Hannah Pilley, who found herself through on goal with just Perry to beat, only to be denied by the legs of the goalkeeper. Leong responded by shooting at Brown after evading a couple of challenges in the area following the enterprise of Anthony and Bloomfield, while Suburbs' goalkeeper smothered a low cross from Leaming in the 56th minute after the flying fullback had caught Wong in possession on Suburbs' right. Back came the visitors, O'Brien steering a shot over the bar after Pilley had exploited a Leaming error on the hour, soon after which Wong and Kate Seatter linked up with Parris, who muscled her way through Burrows' challenge before presenting Byrne with a shooting chance which Perry blocked well at close quarters. The withdrawal of O'Brien and Parris soon afterwards signaled that Suburbs knew the game was up, to which United responded via Dewell - a twenty-five yarder which Brown grabbed greedily - and Burrows, whose 78th minute swashbuckling run out of defence saw her sweep past five opponents before letting fly from twenty-five yards, only to direct a certain "Goal of the Season" contender straight at the goalkeeper. The visitors found a second wind in the later stages of the match, Pilley somehow scooping the ball over an open goal from six yards after Mettam's 81st minute cross caused confusion in United's rearguard, while Anthony was forced to head a Wong cross away with Byrne fast closing after Carlton had sent the fullback away down the right. Five minutes from time, Three Kings delivered the coup de grace in quite sumptuous fashion. Carter was successfully challenged by Anthony inside her own half, with the ball breaking to Leong. She powered through a gap before feeding Ella Russ, who had come on as a substitute for Richards just before the hour mark. If you're going to score your first goal for a club, do it in style, and Russ did exactly that, a sublime twenty-five yarder which arced over Brown before dipping into the far corner of the net - 4-0, and a fine note on which to round off what, by some distance, was the home team's best display of the season, and the visitors' worst. Three Kings:     Perry; Pritchard, Burrows, Martin; Anthony, Mathews, Bloomfield, Dewell, Leaming (Tinsley, 77); Richards (Russ, 57), Leong Suburbs:     Brown; Wong, Carlton, Van Dort, Mettam; Hoeksema (Pilley, 51), Seatter, O'Brien (booked, 5) (Heath, 65), Carter; Parris (Findlay, 71), Byrne Referee:     Ashley Wilson